Are you a mediocre comic who has failed for years to get booked by any of the major clubs? Do you emcee badly at a few free entry nights? Perhaps you emcee your own night, as nobody else will book you. Is your name constantly on the available tonight list? Are you incredibly thick skinned, deluded and full of your own self-importance? Have you done at least 10 open spots? Are you struggling to make any money? Do not despair. I’ve got your back. You have all the qualifications that are required. So why not run COMEDY COURSES? It’s so [...]
I’m not going to Glastonbury festival this year. I haven’t been for quite a few years now. Festivals just don’t seem exciting nowadays. It could be the pervasive mud, the astronomical ticket price or the bland bands. It maybe that I just don’t take the right kind of drugs anymore - I don’t think Statins liven up a festival quite like a few tabs of MDMA. Strangely, given my past, I’ve never actually taken Ecstasy. It is slightly embarrassing to admit as it is one of the most popular party drugs ever and I never partook. I gave up taking [...]
Do you feel that slowly committing suicide one fix at a time is what you deserve?
In the news once again high-ranking police officers are calling for drugs to be legalised and once again nothing will change. We have a huge drug problem in this country and the problem is that drugs are illegal. That's right, it's the bloody ridiculous drug laws that created, and now feed the whole drug problem. At one end of the scale they criminalise and endanger otherwise decent law abiding people who are causing no harm to anybody, and at the other end, they place the incredibly lucrative drug trade in to the hands of real criminals. Terrorists…murderers…advertising executives – the [...]
I’ve had more fun doing cold turkey in a derelict building.