Are you a mediocre comic who has failed for years to get booked by any of the major clubs?
Do you emcee badly at a few free entry nights?
Perhaps you emcee your own night, as nobody else will book you.
Is your name constantly on the available tonight list?
Are you incredibly thick skinned, deluded and full of your own self-importance?
Have you done at least 10 open spots?
Are you struggling to make any money?
Do not despair. I’ve got your back. You have all the qualifications that are required.
So why not run COMEDY COURSES?
It’s so easy. All you need is a shitty room in a pub somewhere.
A cheap microphone. You can get one on Amazon for £3.99.
PA, Spotlights and Stage. Preferable but not necessary.
A Facebook page with a picture of you holding a microphone.
A few made up reviews.
This course changed my life. Barry Smith.
I did this course last week and now I’m head of TV comedy in Zimbabwe. Greg Jones.
This course was so good I am now the funniest plumber in Penge and I’m undergoing gender reassignment. Susan Smith.
Now all you have to do is turn up and show off. Quote a few professional comics jokes. Not yours obviously. Chuck in a few words and phrases like persona, finding your voice, structure, owning the space or timing. Timing is always a good one.
Don’t worry you wont get caught out. Lets face it the people you are teaching don’t know shit about stand-up. That’s why they are on your course.
If you run a course at a professional venue like The Comedy Store, taught by a professional stand up who headlines all over the country like Mike Gunn then I’m fine with that.
If not you are just ripping people off.
Punters beware. Do some research.